On the strangeness of life

Life is weird; it’s mystical. What I mean my mystical is that we can never fully understand it.  Think about the last time something changed you.  It’s probably hard to pin down because often the things that change us the most seem insignificant when they happen; it’s only when we look back that we see what truly transpired.

For as long as I can remember, whenever someone has asked me what superpower I would have if I could pick one, my answer has been the ability to read minds. I know it makes me seem like I’m nosy and just want to be in everyone’s business, but that’s not it at all. I want to understand people. I want to understand what makes people who they are. I want to know why they work in the jobs they they do, why they give their time to certain things, and mostly why they treat people the way they do.

What I have learned, and I’m sure others have figured this out too, is that it’s often the unpleasant things in life that make us who we are.  I say unpleasant because “good” and “bad” are too hard to define; however, it’s not too hard to define when something is unpleasant to us.  I went shopping with a friend a few days ago and we were talking about my unusually high self confidence. I pretty much think I can do anything. It made me think about how I have come to be this way.

I told her that I can point to the exact time period when I went from fearful of failure and caring what people thought to my current attitude of confidence and apathy toward other people’s feelings about me. It wasn’t a huge thing really, I had to move and didn’t want to, but that was absolutely devastating to my teenage self. Years later, I’m glad it happened.

Here, I explain how the death of a friend and my treatment of her before her death, changed the way I treat people.  Although it was a big thing, it’s also a common thing as death is more common than anyone likes. While I am not glad to have lost my friend, it made me a better person and I will forever be in her debt.

Have you ever though about going back and changing things? What else would those things have changed? What good would you lose if you changed the bad?  As for me, I wouldn’t change any of the unpleasantness of my life, because it has made me who I am, and I like me. That may sound prideful, but it’s me – take it or leave it. The truth is, we are all who we are because of what we have experienced.  Everything changes something; how we look at that something is what determines whether that change will be for the better.

If you can point to a pivotal moment and wish to share please do.  What “little” things have made you who you are?


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